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  • Writer's pictureKooky

Seeking Submissive Sean

Updated: Jul 22, 2019

Another Bumble conversation and weird dating experience on the way with this one.

Seeking Submissive Sean, this guy texts a lot, then disappears a while, then checks in again and continues this process almost to the point of weird as he never makes a plan to meet. In all honesty, I normally would have just stopped responding much sooner but of course I need material so I'm going to see where this goes.  I had asked him to look in his calendar for a day to go out for dinner and nothing happened and he doesn't bring it up again.


His texts start to turn to only after 9pm.  He invites me to his house (I haven't met him yet, I am not actually looking to be murdered).  I remind him that is too late for me to suddenly ditch my kids and go out.  I mention that I would prefer a public meeting the first time (I mean obviously, is he new at this?).  Although, I have actually started to wonder how many women just go to strange men's houses right away off these apps.  The more men I talk to on these the more I feel like the men think it's normal to invite ladies over right away no longer even trying to put any effort in.


So after a few more of these weird text conversations where nothing much is said and he makes many comments on how sexy I am (I appreciate compliments but maybe it's better to lead with beautiful vs sexy.  Sexy gives the idea that you only want one thing guys), I convince him it's time to meet up.  At this point I am darn sure he is only looking for a hookup (I do state in my profile 'no hook-ups') and there's nothing wrong with that if that is what you are both looking for (I am not judging you casual sexers).


So we meet for a glass of wine.  Some fairly normal small talk before out of nowhere 'are you submissive?' comes out of his mouth.  I cannot imagine what my face said at this moment.  I feel like I paused for a full minute (asking myself, did this just happen?), it was probably a few seconds.  With no ability to assess that my facial expression was not an answer he continued with 'would you like to see my bed?' I could only muster up a lame 'too soon' before he decided to laugh and say he was joking.  Let's be honest, he wasn't joking, but I'm glad he could assess my comfort level and move on from his questions.


Seeking Submissive Sean red flags:


  • Weird intermittent texting

  • Only available late at night

  • Suspicious hairline (I will let you guess what this looks like, you are probably correct)

The date ends awkwardly and I'm pretty sure I can assume I'm never hearing from him again.  Wouldn't you know it...he texted me the next day asking if I had a good time.  Asking if I was interested in seeing his bed now (he couldn't get that the awkwardness of our last meeting was a sign?).  I politely decline the offer in the only way I know how (all the awkward) and say 'can't say I'm into it, thanks'.  


For some reason with this one I'm not convinced he won't try another time to convince me I'm wrong not to accept his generous offer.  Stay tuned for possible updates.


All the ways I could have been murdered by Seeking Submissive Sean:


1) went to his house for first date as requested, many different options for murder

2) went to check out this very important bed, made commentary on making his bed, he strangles me right there

3) in the awkward  moment when I said goodbye, I make one of my awkward jokes referencing his hairline, he gets in his car and runs me over (it's a stretch but knowing my smart mouth not impossible)

4) poisoning my wine while I was shocked trying to think of how to respond to his fun questions

I have to mention that I'm quite proud this one didn't have a dark parking lot scenario.


#onlinedating #murder #redflags #seekingsubmissive #submissive #sarcasm

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