So, I promised to write when I returned from Mexico and here it is. My fear of flying did not scare the Chef away, turns out I actually did pretty good. I mean, I was crying like a baby when I boarded and it did draw attention but I did better than my worst and he was impressed (after what I had told him). I only took one Ativan and the lovely flight attendant gave me half my booze free, so how could I not have been happy.
We arrived at our Resort once night had already fallen and it was dark outside. This is going to turn into a little bit of a rant at the resort but I feel they deserve it. We stayed at the Bluebay Grand Esmeralda Resort in the Riviera Maya. Online it said 4.5 stars and I think that's a lie, even their salesperson agreed with me. I will say some people loved it and did not have the same experience as we did. When we arrived and checked-in our luggage was loaded onto a Golf Cart to take us to our room. It appeared though someone arrived after us that took precedence, they took our luggage off the cart and left us there without explanation. We were left to find our hotel room in the giant resort and in the dark. One of the things I like about the Chef though is that he made it sort of an adventure and still fun. No stress and who cares because we were in Mexico!
Our room was lovely and had a giant towel swan on the bed, pretty nifty (until I learned that other guests had received champagne and chocolate covered strawberries and in one case an full bottle of tequila, we got jack shit). The Chef and I decided shortly after arriving to go find the beach in the dark. We hilariously walked in circles for a period of time trying to find the beach, it was not clear by their stone signs with an arrow to Playa (meaning beach in Spanish for those who don't already know). I resorted to using my best Spanish and was asking 'Donde esta la puta playa?' which I am pretty sure means 'Where is the Fucking Beach?', it amused the staff thank goodness (keep in mind I drank my face off all day just to get there). We found the beach the next day, we weren't even close.
The Chef and I were having a blast; tanning and exploring the beach. The beach at BlueBay is the worst along that stretch, just to the left is amazing and just to the right...there was a storm apparently and they are working on it. We trekked a few minutes down and found a beautiful lagoon at what is called 'Tres Rios' which means three rivers. A small river goes down and becomes this lagoon. The water is beautiful, the sand is amazing and the area is pure peacefulness. It's the picture I used for this post. We spent the time enjoying each other's company, looking at fish and even catching a fish at one point. We went back to the lagoon many times and I am especially fond of our time there.
The trip did not come without some arguments, and maybe some great opportunities for him to murder me and leave me in Mexico. I am slightly more argumentative with alcohol and well, it's an all-inclusive resort. I'm not even sure why we argued the few times that we did but they were quick and painless for the most part. I know at one point I was far too unhappy that he got suckered into meeting with the sales staff at the resort (I knew better but he was stubborn). No I do not want a timeshare to your crappy resort. Here's piece of advice for sales staff at these resorts...don't catch people as they come in, catch them before they leave. I'd be more likely to purchase if I had such a great experience that I'd come back over and over again. Also, ensure each guest is having an equal and incredible experience. I didn't feel good when people were telling me how they were treated upon arrival and that's not how I was treated. They tried so hard to sell to us and I was very clear that this wasn't even a resort I would return to.
After all of that we met friends at the pool that we continued to meet up and drink with everyday, now social media friends, of course. See, I'm friendly. One night we went over to the bar and watched a boxing match that had Fury (British Boxer) fighting, and we watched with a large group of Brits and it was a great time. The Chef and I came home and are still speaking, he didn't murder me in Mexico and there's a chance this will continue. I have amazing life long memories even though the resort lacked customer service and class.
In saying all of this, there could have been a murder so.....
At the lagoon, I am fed to a crocodile as the Chef was tired of hearing me say 'Donde esta la puta playa'
Poisoned by one of the servers at the pool because I was butchering Spanish to them
I am pretty sure I'd really upset the sales staff, so they set up a hit and we are secretly taken out in our room
The Chef sells me to those Cartel fellas cause he cannot imagine another flight home with me (he lied when he said he was impressed with me on the flight there)
We both survived, are still together and I didn't murder anyone either (goodness, I could have with those sales people). Stay tuned to see where this goes.